Love, and Other Four Letter Words
by xXxThe Phantom's RosexXx
Summary: What do you get partner Clare and Eli up for a video journalism project? Trouble, of course!
1. Chapter 1

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE**_: _OH MY GOSH!_ You Guys! This is my **200****th**** story** since joining Fanfiction in the summer of 2006! I am so excited/happy/elated/stunned/amazed/proud. Like, I know I don't finish most of the stories I have written, but I am finishing these Eclare stories and love it! I love getting back into writing after taking a short hiatus for a bit. Oh, I am so happy! 200? _Really_? Like…wow! Haha now about this story! It's slightly AU and, of course, I do not own Degrassi. Please enjoy and please review! Reading your reviews just makes me so happy! I am so amazed that someone (not just someone but people, lots of people actually) do find my writing worth reading, and to me, that's just mindblowing haha but please read and review, and most importantly, ENJOY! Yours truly!

_**Love, and Other Four Letter Words**_

**CHAPTER ONE: **

Clare Edwards walked into Journalism the first day of school not knowing what to expect. Since last year, with Eli helping her more and more with her writing, she suddenly became obsessed with her newfound hobby. She loved to write, and had decided that signing up for the journalism class would be a fun elective. After all, she could write pieces for the school paper and articles for the yearbook. She could hardly wait. And then she saw him.

He was sitting in the last row, his Converse sneakers stained with Lord knows what were propped up on the chair in front of him. He was smacking gum, and smirking when he saw her. Clare inwardly cringed. Of course, she would be in a class with Eli Goldsworthy. They hadn't spoken since the breakup, which was back before summer. It was weird, seeing as they had been so close, not to speak to him. Apparently the breakup had been hard on him. He had totally jumped off the deep end – not that it was a far jump for him – and spiraled downwards. He abused his antidepressants and became violent and dangerous to himself and others. To be honest, he really frightened her.

According to Adam (Eli would probably kill them both if he knew they still talked), Eli had started seeing a therapist, was back on a normal medication schedule, and was doing lots better. He was getting more and more involved with the local theater, and seemed to be happy. Clare was glad to hear that, but it still hurt knowing that they could be fine (well, for the most part) without each other.

She was dating Jake and Eli was popping around with Imogen, and Clare had no idea where that was going other than when she passed them in the hall that morning, Eli had automatically thrown his arm around Imogen who giggled and drank it up.

And there he sat – staring right at her, those green eyes piercing through her. Clare felt her skin crawl with that stare. Part of her wondered what would happen if she sat down right next to him, or in front of him. An evil thought popped into her head. She hadn't spoken to Eli in ages. She had no idea where, exactly, they stood. Where they – could they – be friends again? She decided to test out her little theory, and chose to sit right in front of him.

"Move your feet off my chair, please," she said, as she would to anyone else. No emotion, no connection. Eli was just another person.

Eli Goldsworthy sighed, took his feet off her chair, and gestured towards it with his hands, "Your throne, your highness."

Clare sat down without another word to him, and tidily pulled out her purple notebook, her matching purple binder, and her matching purple pen. Eli rolled his eyes; she always had to be so…orderly. Everything had to match and go together and be completely organized. Clare didn't like mess.

Eli was a mess.

He smirked and decided to conduct a little experiment of his own. He missed talking to her, and yelling was better than not talking, right? So, Eli promptly gave the back of Clare's chair a good kick. She lurched forward, and cleared her throat before quietly re-adjusting her chair into its proper position. Eli stifled a chuckle. Oh, she made a huge mistake by sitting in front of him, that was for sure. He was going to definitely enjoy himself.

_I wonder how long it will take her before she finally changes seats,_ Eli mused, _maybe just today if I keep it up. But then again, I don't want to go too overboard. It might not be too bad having her sitting here. I can definitely have fun with this…_

Clare sighed and flipped her notebook open to the first page. She scribbled the date in the top right corner and waited for the bell to ring and for class to start. Maybe once their teacher began lecture, Eli would finally just leave her alone. _Ha,_ Clare rolled her eyes, _yeah right. He's enjoying himself. He loves watching me squirm. Maybe he missed me…or at least, he missed picking on me to no end. I hope class gets started soon. _

Her wish came true. Their teacher, a new teacher to Degrassi, stood at the front of the classroom and wrote his name on the board just as the bell tolled. "Mr. Larson."

"Hello class," Mr. Larson cleared his throat and straightened his tie, "My name is Mr. Larson, and this is my first year teaching at Degrassi. I taught at West Briar before transferring here, and look forward to being at this school. I've heard great things."

"Just don't get near Eli," someone in the second row said, "cross him, and he might knife you."

"Fritz brought the knife," Clare spoke up, "he didn't have anything to do with that. Besides, he wouldn't hurt anyone."

_Where did that come from_, Eli's eyes were wide, and wished he could just melt into a puddle like the Wicked Witch in the Wizard of Oz, when everyone turned around to stare at him. A whole summer had gone by, and still he couldn't shake that reputation. No one wanted to cross him – not after the drama he had been tied up in last year, and his temper. Adam was the only one who really talked to him. Adam and Imogen. Imogen was weird too. A loner. They fit in quite well.

"Ah-hem," Mr. Larson cleared his throat, "let's get back on track here. I know you all think you have this class pegged to a 't.' You think we are going to write articles for the newspaper and put together a yearbook, right? Well, I have something different up my sleeve. How many of you have ever heard of a V-YB?"

No one said anything.

Mr. Larson looked around, sighed, and continued, "A V-YB stands for Video Yearbook and we are going to be putting together the first ever V-YB for Degrassi!"

"Um, excuse me," a girl in the first row raised her hand, "What exactly is a Video Yearbook?"

"Well," Mr. Larson continued, "a V-YB is a compilation of video footage taken throughout the school year and put together on to DVDs. At the end of the school year, we will be selling these DVDs after a special screening of the DVD in the auditorium. You all will be partnered up and given video cameras. You will use these cameras to capture random moments throughout the year. You will also be given a list, on that list is a name of students. It's your job to make sure everyone on that list gets one-on-one footage and tells a favorite memory on camera. Also, students can use the videos to leave personal notes to one another. It's just a really neat project and I am looking forward to trying it out here at Degrassi."

Clare raised her hand.

"Yes?"

"So, we won't be doing any writing?"

"We will still be writing articles for the paper, yes. Your main assignment, will be your videos. Your video collections will be due – on a flashdrive – in February. I will be the one putting the DVD together. But I just think this will be a fun project for everyone, and something that will definitely be very memorable. Face it, yearbooks are outdated. Who wants to stare at a bunch of pictures when we can capture living memories?"

Clare did have to admit, she liked the idea. It'd be fun! She could hardly wait, already, to see the finish product of their work. Clare was also thankful that, despite the V-YBs, she could still pursue her writing through the school paper. This was going to be a great year, she just had a feeling.

"Let me call roll and then I will put you with your partners. I will give you a video camera and your assignment for the day is to video tape an interview with your partner about your summer and your expectations for the school year. There are different forms of media, people. Let's keep that in mind this year."

Roll went quickly, and next it was time to be partnered up. Mr. Larson decided to go with the calling off "one" "two" "one" method.

"Ones will go to the front, twos in the back. Then I will pick your partners from there, to make this completely random. I don't want anyone getting to choose their partners. I want this to be a project on getting to truly know another person."

Mr. Larson then counted off the ones and twos. Clare and Eli both were twos. Clare sighed and made her way to the back wall, where Eli was already leaning. There were six others in their group of twos.

"So, what do you all think of the V-YDs?" Clare asked the group as Mr. Larson was busy sorting out the ones.

"I think it'll be fun," a girl named Sammy smiled, "I mean, it's going to be really different, but that's what will make it fun."

"I can't wait to see the finished product," Clare agreed, "I think it'll be something really special. We will always treasure these memories, but with the video, we can really look back on them. I think it's such a neat idea."

"If you're into the whole video thing," Eli shrugged, leaning against the back wall with his left foot pressed against it.

"You're not?" Another girl asked, looking up at Eli with enthralled eyes. She looked young. Possibly a sophomore.

"Eh," Eli shrugged, "it's whatever."

"Well, hopefully if we are partners, I can get you to change your mind."

Eli's eyes looked like they were going to pop from his head. Clare bit her lower lip to hide a smile as Eli, flustered, said, "Um…yeah…uh-huh, sure."

"I'm Maggie. I'm a sophomore," _So I was right_, Clare mused. "and I am just so excited to be in this journalism class. I really think the videos are just awesome. Mr. Larson is really cool for coming up with such a neat idea. It'll be so much fun. You're Eli, right?"

"Depends."

"Is it true you beat someone up last year?" Maggie stared up at him, again with those enthralled, curious eyes.

"He had it coming."

"And that you had a meltdown in the middle of the school play?"

Eli just stared at her. Clare knew he was wishing she'd just shut up already and leave him alone. Maggie, on the other hand, wasn't quite so keen at reading people.

Eli in particular.

"Well, I think it's really neat that you're so in touch with your emotions. You aren't afraid to stand up in front of the whole school and tell them how some girl broke your heart and that you no longer believe in happily-ever-afters. But they _do_ exist, you know. Maybe you just haven't found yours yet, but your happily-ever-after is out there and…"

"_I'm in touch with my emotions_?" Eli chuckled, "That's a good one, Mags."

"It's Maggie, but okay. And it wasn't a joke. I think it's so cool when guys express themselves like you chose to. Whoever she is, she must have really hurt you. I think you'll find someone _so_ much better for you this year…"

Eli nearly choked on his own saliva, _where did this girl come from? _"Um…" He lifted his eyes towards Clare, not really knowing what to say.

"In fact, I am _sure_ of it."

"Eli," Clare smiled warmly, loving the opportunity that had presented itself to her, "Maggie seems to really…get you. I'm so glad you've finally found someone to connect with. Maggie," Clare turned to the bubbly blonde, "Eli knows this really great frozen yogurt place called The Yo. I am sure after school…"

"_Shut up_," Eli mouthed towards Clare, "_shut up, shut up, shut up_!"

"…he'd love to take you there and…um…talk about his emotions!"

"Be careful, Maggie," a guy in their group warned, "he might go ape-shit on you and…"

"What is your problem?" Eli turned towards the guy who had just spoken.

"Eli didn't go '_ape-shit_,'" Clare corrected, shocking Eli at her use of the 's-word'

"What'd you know about it?" The guy asked, rolling his eyes.

Clare sighed, "What grade are you in?"

"Tenth."

"I thought so. Word of advice kid," Clare said, "don't talk about something you know nothing about."

He shut up pretty quickly, and Eli just glanced at Clare out of the corner of his eye. She could see a small shadow of a tiny little smile playing at the corners of his lips. But, as quickly as the moment happened, it faded away.

"So, do you really want to go to The Yo with me?" Maggie grinned so big, Clare and Eli both thought that her face would rip in two.

Eli sighed and agreed, "Sure. Why not."

Maggie thus proceeded to run over and hug him, which Eli cleverly finagled out of, "One condition though," he raised a finger, "_no hugging_."

Mr. Larson made his way to their group and glanced at his role sheet, "Alrighty, are you guys excited for the V-YB?" Everyone nodded, but Eli. "Okay then," he again checked the clipboard with the role sheet attached, "Maggie and Nathan, you will be partnered up."

Maggie didn't bother to hide her disappointment, "Aw, at least we can still hang out though, after school."

Eli nodded, and said, "Oh yeah, it'll be fine. Have fun with Nathan."

Mr. Larson glanced at his clipboard again, "Okay, Sammy and Michaela, you two will be a group. Um…David and Henry, you are a group…um, Clare and…"

Clare felt her throat tighten.

"Eli. You two will be a group."

"Uh…" Eli glanced at Clare, and then back to Mr. Larson, "but we…uh…"

"We know each other," Clare finished for him, "You said to partner up with people we didn't know."

Mr. Larson looked nervous, "Well…um…you two haven't been acting like you really get along. Maybe this project will be good for you. Learn more about each other and try to really connect. Get inside the other's head."

"I don't want to be in her head," Eli folded his arms across his chest stubbornly, "I don't even want to be in _my_ head, much less _hers_. Can't you pair me with someone else?"

"He and Maggie would work well," Clare interjected.

"Uh…" Eli glanced towards Maggie who was bouncing and waving at him, "I…think maybe…"

"You two are partners, and that's final," Mr. Larson gave them both a sharp look, "You two need to work something out, that's easy to see. This project will be good for you two. I just know it."

After pairing off the remaining students, Mr. Larson asked everyone to have a seat – with their partners – and he would distribute the video cameras. Clare grabbed her stuff and went over to the desk next to Eli's. He didn't even look at her.

"Let's just try and work together," Clare sighed, "It could be worse."

"Please, elaborate."

"You could be partnered up with Maggie."

"Because of _you_, I have to go to The Yo with her."

"Aw, leave her alone," Clare rolled her eyes, setting up her notebook again, "She's sweet. Very cute."

"_Cute_?" Eli laughed, "good one."

"She likes you."

"Why."

"Beats me. Now hush, Mr. Larson's going to explain how to use the video cameras."

Eli held up the video camera they'd been given, "It doesn't look _that_ hard."

"You say that, but I bet _you'd_ be the one to drop it or something."

Eli made a fact at her before turning his attention to Mr. Larson, who was standing at the front of the classroom holding up one of the cameras. He explained to the class how to turn them on, how to press RECORD how to save the videos and upload them and transfer them to a flashdrive. He told the class not to worry about editing because he'd be the one comprising the videos.

"Your job is to be creative. Now then, head out. Leave this classroom. Go anywhere in the school – outside, inside – and do your interviews! Ask about their summer and their goals for this year. Dig in deep! We will watch the videos next class for a grade. And remember guys, be creative. Step out of those comfort zones!"

Well, Clare was definitely out of her comfort zone, that was for sure. With Eli as her partner, maybe this year wasn't going to be as great as she had hoped. Eli grabbed his beat-up backpack and flung it over his shoulder before standing over her desk.

"Let's go."

"Where do you want to do this?" Clare asked.

"Outside. By Morty or something."

"You still have that thing?"

"Why get rid of it? I love that car. Just because you didn't doesn't mean…"

"Okay, okay," Clare packed up her things, "by Morty it is."

She followed him out towards the parking lot, watching as he fumbled around with the video camera. "I think I figured out how to turn it on."

Clare rolled her eyes, "Mr. Larson just explained all of that."

"Well, there he is," Eli smiled, proudly, at the hearse, "As great as you remembered?"

Clare scoffed.

"Let's not take too much time doing this. I just kind of want to get this over with."

"Me too," Clare agreed, thankful that Eli shared the same sentiment.

"Okay," Eli adjusted the camera, "It's on and…yup, recording. You go first. Tell us about your summer."

"Shouldn't we, like, introduce ourselves first?"

"Why?"

"Well…I don't know," Clare hopped in front of the camera, "Hi! I'm Clare Edwards and I am junior here at Degrassi. I like reading and writing and baking."

"About your summer, _dimwit_! Not about your life!"

Clare rolled her eyes, "Hush, Eli," she spoke to the camera, "I could stand here and tell you guys that my summer was fantastic – that I went on some big trip to Rome or something with my parents. But, that wouldn't be true. And I can't lie. So here it is. My summer. My parents officiated their divorce. My dad moved to Los Angeles, and my mom and I haven't really spoken in quite some time. I am living with my boyfriend, Jake, and his parents right now. I hope to get a summer internship in New York City at a publishing company I applied for; and my goals for this year are to get all A's and, of course, get my internship."

"Wait, wait, wait," Eli set the camera down on Morty's hood, "Back up…"

"What?" Clare furrowed her eyebrows, "What's wrong?"

"Let me get this straight," Eli ran a hand through his hair, "Your parents finalized their divorce? Like, that's _it_? And then your dad moved? To LA? _Seriously_? And you're living with Jake because your mom…and don't even get me _started_ on that internship."

"What? What's the problem, Eli?"

"N-nothing I guess. I just…"

Eli didn't know what to say. He knew what was wrong, and he knew why he was upset. Clare's life had been completely flipped upside down, and he hadn't had a clue about it. He thought his summer was a pain in the ass, but hers?

He ran a hand through his hair again and leaned against Morty, "It's just weird."

"What is?"

"Not knowing what's going on in your life anymore."

"Your turn," Clare grabbed the camera, desperate to change the subject, "Go."

"We aren't done discussing your summer," Eli dodged the camera, "What else has been going on?"

"Nope, my turn's up. It's yours now. Go."

"Fine," Eli gave in, "Um…well everyone knows about my breakdown in the middle of the school play. Well, I got some help over the summer so hopefully no more breakdowns."

"What kind of help?"

"I don't think the kids watching this are really interested in…"

He had a point. Clare wouldn't want her personal stuff being watched by the school. She set the camera down.

"I think it's off."

"Good," Eli said, "We've both changed a lot over this summer. For the better, and maybe for the not so better. It happens, Clare. People change. Like, take you for instance, you'd _never_ move in with me when we dated."

"The circumstances are different," Clare blushed, and folded her arms across her chest, "I have nowhere to go and Jake and his family have been really close to me for as long as I can remember. They just are helping me out."

"So," Eli kicked her lightly with the toe of his shoe, "do you and the jockstrap do it like…_every night_ then?"

Clare scoffed, and turned to face him. He was smirking, pleased with himself and the reaction he incited. "No," Clare rolled her eyes, "I have my own bedroom there, thank you very much. And don't call Jake a jockstrap!"

"I'll call him what I want," Eli raised his eyebrows, "so…is Saint Clare is just as…_saintly_?"

"If this is your way of finding out if I am still a virgin or not…"

"_Whoa_!" Eli held up his hands in defense, his eyes wide, "No one said anything about _that_."

"But you implied in."

"I did no such thing," he folded his arms over his chest and tried to look as innocent as possible. The truth was, it was killing him. He wanted to know if Clare and Jake had done it. If Jake had been the one to take her virginity. And if he had, Eli was certainly going to…

_Going to what_, he asked himself, _I can't just punch him in the face for sleeping with his own girlfriend. But Clare…Clare is different. If he slept with her…it was because he somehow convinced her. She wasn't ready, and I don't think she still is ready. Just the thought of him…touching her. _The very image made Eli want to puke.

"You're such a pig! Whether I am, or am not, it's still none of your business."

"Clare…"

"And I can't believe you'd even try to…"

"Clare…"

"…who asks someone something like that in the first place?"

"Clare…"

"It's totally and completely inappropriate conversation especially to be having with…"

"Clare…"

"_WHAT_?"

"Does that little red light mean that the camera is still recording?"

"Eli, what are you even…oh."

Sure enough, the camera (which was sitting next to Clare and pointed at them) was still recording. Clare snatched up the camera and shut it off.

"_Shit_," she hissed.

"Since when do you curse?"

"Since I accidentally filmed my ex-boyfriend asking me about the status of my virginity and the whole entire class will be watching this tomorrow!"

"Can't we edit it?"

"Mr. Larson said he will handle all the editing. I have no idea how," Clare buried her face in her hands, "Just kill me now. Put me out of my misery."

Eli made a gun with his fingers, "Bang."

"Not. Helping."

"Well I don't know what to do," he grabbed the camera and looked it over.

"Our whole class will see this," Clare cried, "The whole class will know…"

"Know what?"

"And you're _still_ asking!"

"Sorry," Eli did his best kicked-puppy impression. It didn't work.

"This _can't_ be happening! Could this year _possibly_ be off to a worst start?"

"You could have to go to The Yo with possibly the most obnoxious tenth-grader since…well…you."

"Still. Not. Helping."

"Well, there's no use in stressing out I guess. What can we do?"

"Cry."

"That's it," Eli hopped off Morty's hood, "you're coming with what's-her-name and me to The Yo this afternoon."

"I can't," Clare shook her head, "besides, it'd crush Maggie."

"No, you can sit at another table and kind of just…watch me be tortured by her presence. Would that cheer you up just a little teeny-tiny bit?"

Clare thought it over as Eli flashed her the kicked-puppy look again. She melted, "Fine! I guess it will be…entertaining."

"For you anyways."

"She's not _that_ bad?"

"_Not that bad_?" Eli choked, "Clare, she's like the Energizer Bunny on like…cotton candy flavored acid!"

"You like cotton candy."

Eli just glared at her, "Not. Helping."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Clare couldn't believe that they had just discussed the question of her virginity on camera in a video which about thirty students would be watching tomorrow. The very thought made her want to throw up. She hated the fact that she had to be partnered up with Eli, and she hated the fact that he had asked her something so…personal. She had been so excited about the new school year, and suddenly, it wasn't quite turning out as planned.

Clare arrived at The Yo and, after picking out her concoction of cheesecake frozen yogurt with strawberries, cherries, blueberries, frosted animal cookies, sprinkles, chocolate sauce, and marshmallow crème, took a seat at one of the high tables. Eli and Maggie would be there any minute now. She pulled out her latest vampire novel, and poured over the pages while munching on her yogurt.

The bell above the door jingled, and in walked Eli with a bouncing Maggie. She hurried over to the self-serve yogurt, excited to pick out her flavor. Eli spied Clare and gave her his classic eye-roll. Clare shoveled some yogurt into her mouth to hide the threatening smile.

Eli walked behind her, grabbing on to one of her red curls and giving a small tug as he walked past. Clare turned and stuck her tongue out at him. He smirked, and walked towards Maggie.

"What flavor looks good to you?" He asked.

"I wish I could try all of them."

"You can mix them," Eli suggested.

"Really?" Maggie grabbed one of the paper containers and began filling it with various flavors of frozen yogurt. Eli sighed, and filled his own paper cup with Red Velvet.

After getting their toppings and weighing their yogurt containers, Eli paid for the both of them, and took a table across from Clare's. Maggie sat with her back to Clare, and Eli tried not to spend too much time staring at her. He decided maybe he should try talking to Maggie. Maybe Clare was right, maybe she wasn't that bad.

"So, Maggie," Eli began, "what do you think of the V-YDs?"

"I think it's super fun," Maggie giggled, "I love the idea of capturing memories like that. I just wish you and I could have been partnered up. But you're with…Clare right?"

"Yeah," Eli nodded.

"I'm so sorry," Maggie apologized, not realizing that Clare was at the next table over, "She is your ex, isn't she?"

Clare stopped reading; she was curious to see how Eli would answer that question. She kept her nose buried in her book, but her ears were tuned into the conversation at the next table.

"Um, yeah," Eli nodded, "last year was rough for me. For both of us. We just didn't work."

"Well, it's like I said earlier, you'll find someone better."

"Um…" Eli glanced over at Clare, their eyes met, and while Maggie was busy with her yogurt, he made a face at her, causing Clare to break her unspoken rule, and smile.

"Eli," Maggie glanced up from her yogurt, and Eli quickly returned his attention to her.

"Yup?"

"Maybe we can talk to Mr. Larson about switching partners. It must be so weird for you having to work with Clare and Nathan is such a jerk!"

"Clare isn't that bad to work with," Eli's eyes met Clare's once again as he spoke, "I mean, she is obnoxious but…" Eli smirked at the look on Clare's face.

"I just don't want you to be put in an uncomfortable situation," Maggie continued, "and I'm afraid you are. I mean, I would just die if I ever had to talk to my ex again. Besides, you should be focusing on moving on, and working with her just isn't helping."

"Maggie, she isn't the devil, okay?"

Clare smiled, taking a bite of her frozen yogurt, enjoying the conversation.

"I just don't want you to be upset," Maggie took a bite of her yogurt, "and I want to be your V-YD partner, not her. We'd have so much fun together! It'd be so much fun filming together at lunch and during class and after school – we could spend so much time together!"

"Uh…" Eli uncomfortably placed a hand on the nape of his neck.

"Besides, I know you don't really want to work with her. How did it go earlier with filming during class-time? It was awful working with Nathan. All he wanted to talk about was how many girls he slept with over the summer and how much he drank. It was disgusting."

"I'm sorry," Eli apologized, "but it wasn't so bad working with Clare."

"What did you two talk about?"

Her virginity.

Eli smirked at the thought of saying that, and wondered what Maggie would do if he did. The whole thing would be pretty funny. Not for Clare though.

Poor Clare.

Tomorrow, everyone in class would see that. It would be super embarrassing for her. Suddenly, Eli felt a pang of guilt. It was kind of his fault…he shouldn't have…it crossed a line. Lines. Working with Clare meant there were lines there that didn't exist before.

When they worked as English partners, there might have been lines, but he just didn't care to pay attention to them. Now, there were lines and he didn't have a choice but to pay attention and stay within them.

Before, it was a challenge. He crossed every line he could in that dumb English class. They bantered and he teased her and for a while, before getting together, there were several times they almost kissed.

But things were different now. There were rules.

He couldn't just tease her about anything and everything. He couldn't bump his hip into hers when they walked. He couldn't casually swing his arm over her shoulders. He couldn't kiss her. He couldn't do a lot of things he could the last time they were partners.

Maybe he couldn't then either, but just chose to anyway.

Eli never was a fan of rules.

But this time, he had to follow the rules. And the rules were very clear – no crossing the line with Clare Edwards.

"You'll just have to see tomorrow," Eli replied.

"I told Nathan all about my summer. My parents took me to France with them. It was so beautiful. I'd never left the country before. Then I worked at a summer camp for the rest of the summer break. It was lots of fun. I'd never been a camp counselor before! We had to learn several different songs to teach the kids…wanna hear my favorite?"

"Um…"

"I'm an acorn small and round, lying on the cold, cold ground…"

"Maggie…"

"No one wants to pick me up…"

"Uh…"

"Just because I am a nut. I'm a nut, I'm a nut, I'm a nut…"

Eli met Clare's eyes again, and they both stared at each other in utter shock as Maggie continued.

"Called myself up on the phone, just to hear my golden tone. Asked myself out on a date, picked me up at a half-past eight."

"Maggie…"

"I'm a nut, I'm a nut, I'm a nut…"

"You're somethin' but I don't think a nut is quite it…"

"You don't like my song?" Maggie asked.

"I just don't think a frozen yogurt place is the best place to break out into song…"

"There's a dance too! Want me to show you!"

"Um…no," Eli said a bit too quickly. Maggie looked as if she was on the verge of tears.

"I didn't mean it like that," Eli tried to recover, "I just think…The Yo just isn't…it's not the right place to show me a song and dance. Why don't you um…show me…outside?"

Eli cursed his niceness. Maggie was practically jumping up and down in her chair, "Okkie dokkie!"

She hopped down from the chair and all but ran outside. Eli turned back towards Clare, who, from behind a well-placed hand, was smiling.

He gave her a little wave, before following Maggie outside.

Clare shut her book, and watched through the window as Maggie sang and did her little dance. Eli just stood there, with his hand on the nape of his neck, watching her with eyes that seemed as though, at any moment, they would pop from their sockets.

Clare couldn't help but laugh. Poor Eli looked so miserable standing out there. But he did deserve it for what was recorded on to the video camera. That darn video camera.

Clare suddenly felt a pang of nerves in her stomach. Tomorrow, the whole class would watch that video. Stupid Eli! Clare even began considering the idea of skipping class tomorrow, but chose against it.

The bell jingled again and Eli walked towards her; Maggie was nowhere in sight.

"What did you do? Murder her?" Clare couldn't help but smile.

"No, she had to go home. I told her I left something inside but that I'd see her tomorrow in class."

"Her dance was impressive."

"You should have heard the rest of the song," Eli hopped up in the empty chair across from Clare's, "So, I'm pretty sure she thinks you're the devil."

"So I heard," Clare nodded, "So are you going to talk to Mr. Larson about changing partners?"

"No way," Eli looked at her as if she sprouted a second head, "Are you crazy? And work with that? No way!"

"She isn't that bad…"

"Clare, the girl broke out into song and dance at a yogurt shop. She's that bad."

"She really likes you though."

"Lucky me. Come on, let me drive you home."

"You don't have to…"

"I know," Eli shrugged, "but why not. However, if you start breaking out into song and dance, I will be forced to throw you out onto the curb."

"Aw, but I've been practicing my musical number all week."

"Shut up, Edwards. You want a ride or not?"

"I've been practicing my singing!"

"Do you want a ride or not?"

Clare gathered up her things and followed Eli out to Morty, "You know," she said as Eli unlocked his door, "he really isn't that bad."

"Of course he's not," Eli said proudly, "He's Morty and he's awesome."

The duo climbed into the hearse and threw their bags into the back. Eli turned the key in the ignition, then turned on the radio.

"Hold on," Clare stopped him, "There's something important I want to tell you."

"What?" Eli asked, a bit nervous at what she had to say.

"It's really important, Eli. I-I don't know how to say this…"

"Clare," Eli lowered his voice, "it's fine. You can still tell me anything."

"Well…it's just…" Clare cleared her throat before belting out, "The phaaaaantom of the operaaaa is therrre…insiiiide your miiiind!"

"Okay, that's it," Eli pointed to the passenger door, "out. Now."

"But I'm not done!"

"Clare!"

"Masquerade! Paper faces on parade! You can fool annny friend who evvverrrr kneeew you!"

"Clare!"

"Seventy-six trombones caught the morning sun, with a hundred and ten cornets close at haaaand…"

"Clare!"

"To the rhythm of MARCH MARCH MARCH all the kids began to march…"

"Clare!"

"And they're marching still to this daaaay!"

"CLARE!" Eli shouted, "ARE YOU FINISHED?"

"Ooooklahoma where the…"

"CLARE!"

"Alright, alright," Clare giggled, "I'm done, I'm done. I promise."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Because if not, I will throw you out of this hearse."

"I promise," Clare solemnly nodded.

"Good," Eli continued to drive.

"Loathing, unadulterated loathing…for your face, your voice, your cloooothing! Let's just say, I loath it all! Every little trait…"

"CLARE!"


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: When I first started this, I didn't know Clare's mom married Jake's dad so now I do and that's how I will be writing this story – with his dad and her mom married. Also, I am so sorry that this is going to be mostly dialogue. The next chapter will be better…I promise!

Chapter Three

"Here you go," Eli stopped the hearse in front of Clare's house, "I still can't believe your mom and Jake's dad…weird."

"Tell me about it," Clare rolled her eyes, "well, thank you for the ride."

"Don't mention it," Eli shrugged, "I didn't have anything else to really do. I guess I'll see you in Journalism tomorrow? I'm really sorry about what got recorded. I didn't…"

Clare sighed and held up a hand, "Eli, let's just…not make it worse, okay?"

"Got it," he nodded, "See you tomorrow, Clare."

Clare smiled at him before hopping out of the hearse and on to the curb, "See you tomorrow, Eli."

She hoisted her backpack upon her shoulder and headed to the front door. She couldn't help but think about how much fun they'd had together. Why were they having fun together? Just hours ago, they hated each other, right?

She shouldn't be having fun with Eli Goldsworthy of all people, should she? There was a line, boundaries now. They couldn't just pick up and start over as if they were back in that English class again. Clare turned and waved to the hearse before unlocking the door. Like the perfect gentleman, he was waiting to make sure she got inside safe and sound.

Clare fumbled her key with shaky hands before finally turning it in the lock.

"Where have you been?" Jake asked, coming down the stairs.

"Just out…working with my journalism partner. We are making a video yearbook. It's a lot of fun."

"That sounds cool," Jake jumped off the last step and headed towards the kitchen to grab a soda from the fridge, "Who's your partner?"

"Oh," Clare's breath caught in her throat, "Um, a new student. She just moved here from Lakewood. Her dad got transferred here over the summer."

Jake nodded, "That's cool. Maybe I can meet her tomorrow."

"Oh," Clare blushed, "Yeah, she'd…um…like you," Clare snatched an apple from the bowl and took a huge bite of it before he could ask her another question. She had no idea where the lie had come from, or why she had chosen to lie to Jake about Eli. They were just partners, there was no reason to lie…but somehow, Clare felt like it was the right thing to do.

She was kicking herself the rest of the evening for lying to Jake. Now he wanted to meet her fake partner. Maybe she could convince Maggie to…but Maggie thought she was the devil incarnate, so maybe that wouldn't be the best idea.

Clare flopped down on her bed and covered her face with her pillow and let out a scream. She couldn't believe that she actually let herself have a good time with Eli and that she had actually lied to Jake about him. Why did she even lie in the first place?

_BING!_

An IM popped up on Clare's computer. She abandoned her bed and her pillow to check and see who on earth would be messaging her. She and Ali still weren't exactly on speaking terms…

Eli.

_- Edwards, it's past your bedtime. What are you doing still online?_

Her bedtime? Clare glanced at the clock. It was eleven. She usually was in bed by ten. She sat down at her computer and typed:

_- I don't have a bedtime, thank you very much. What do you need?_

Eli replied, _Just wanted to make sure you were going to show your face in class tomorrow and not leave me sitting there like a jackass while the whole class hears about your virgin…_

_- SHUT UP, ELI! I thought we said we wouldn't discuss this anymore. _

_- Virginity. _

_- I can NOT believe you just typed that. What do you care about my virginity?_

_- Okay yeah, let's change the subject. This is getting awkward._

_- Only because you keep asking about my virginity._

_- I don't ask. It casually comes up in conversation._

_- WHAT? Eli…leave me alone._

_- You know what I think?_

_- No, and I don't care. Good night, Eli._

_- I think you are and you're just acting all hot and bothered about it to make it seem like you aren't._

_- Why would I act about anything? I don't care what you think of me._

_- Oh but you do._

_- Okay, I am getting angry. I had a good time with you this afternoon and now I am getting angry. I am going to bed before I decide to rip your head off tomorrow._

_- And get blood all over yourself?_

_- Good night, Eli._

_- You aren't going to go to bed. You're going to sit there and stare at the computer screen._

_- Why would I do that?_

_- I don't know, Clare. I've never understood why you do the things you do._

_- Well because of YOU I just lied to my boyfriend_

_- Whoa, why?_

_- Because…how the hell am I supposed to know?_

_- Hell? Saint Clare just cursed? Anyways, back to the subject at hand…_

_- Stop talking about my virginity!_

_- You're the one that brings it up. All I was going to say is: why did you lie to the jockstrap_

_- I lied to the jockstrap because it seemed easier than telling him the truth._

_- I thought you hated when I called him a jockstrap_

_- I do…UGH! Anyways…it was easier._

_- Than?_

_- Telling him that you're my partner. So I lied and said a new girl from Lakewood was my partner._

_- Oh._

_- And now he wants to meet her._

_- Do I need to dress in drag?_

_- Oh my god! Don't make me laugh when I want to rip your face off!_

_- *Smirk*_

_- And don't you dare smirk at me._

- …

_- You're still smirking…I know it!_

- …_I didn't say anything._

_- But you smirked it._

_- Tell me, Edwards - I am just curious - …how does one, "smirk" something?"_

_- I am going to bed now._

_- No you're not._

_- Wanna bet._

_- You aren't going to go to bed. I know you._

_- Clare?_

_- I know you're just sitting there Clare._

_- Yup, still just sitting there staring at the computer screen._

_- Clare?_

_- Clare?_

Clare abandoned her computer and walked over towards her bed. She sat down on the mattress and hugged her pillow to her chest, scared to death of the way Eli made her feel. She wished those darn goosebumps would just go away. Stupid Eli.

"Okay, class," Mr. Larson cleared his throat, "we are going to begin by watching our assignments from yesterday. The first to present are Maggie and Nathan. Please bring up your video camera and I will pull up the video on the computer-projector for us all to watch."

With Mr. Larson's attention turned the computer, Eli wadded up a piece of paper and threw the paper ball right at Clare. She turned to him and glared.

"You ignored me last night."

"I went to bed," she replied simply, "just as I said I was."

Eli made a face at her and Clare had to fight the urge not to smile or laugh.

"Okay class, attention please," Mr. Larson played the video.

**Maggie: Come on, Nathan, we have to do our project. Stop staring at anything in a skirt that walks past!**

The class laughed

**Nathan: Hey, summer just ended. All the girls are tan and lookin' _fine_ today!**

**Maggie: But our project…**

**Nathan: You go first…I'm busy**

The class laughed again as Nathan approached a blonde in a skirt.

**Maggie sighed, "Nathan…oh…alright. Hi. I'm Maggie and this is my second year at Degrassi. Over the summer my parents and I went to France and had an amazing time…**

**Nathan: France? That's where kissing originated, right?**

The class laughed again, and Nathan just smiled and nodded from the front of the classroom.

"Oh my God," Clare looked to Eli, "is he _serious_?"

Eli shrugged as the video continued.

**Maggie: Precisely, Nathan. Anyways, as I was saying…we had just a great time and I really enjoyed touring Paris and I am looking forward to the new school year. I've already met more people that I didn't know last year. Like…this one guy…**

"Oh no," Eli turned to Clare, "Oh no…"

"Oh this is _great_!" Clare giggled, "And to think I actually considered skipping class today…this is making being here _so_ worth it!"

**Maggie: He invited me to The Yo and I am really excited to get to know him more. He's so sweet.**

"This is _NOT_ happening," Eli was as red as a beet.

"This _totally_ is happening," Clare giggled, "and I love every second of it."

"Shut up, Edwards!"

"Make me."

"Don't make me make you," Eli threatened.

**Maggie: Anyway, Nathan, let's hear about your summer!**

**Nathan: I went to my friend's beach house and hit it with some pretty bangin' chicks.**

**Maggie: Oh…**

**Nathan: It was like…so awesome. Like _day-um_!"**

**Maggie: Nathan…**

**Nathan: What?**

**Maggie: Um…I'm just going to turn off the camera now…**

The video turned black. The camera had been shut off. Mr. Larson was just staring at the computer screen, stunned.

"Wow…not exactly what I was expecting, I have to be honest…"

"It was better, huh?" Nathan asked, "These video things are off the _chay-ain_!"

"Um…why don't you two…uh…just take your camera and…uh…go sit down."

Clare had to bite her lip to keep from laughing, but her mood quickly changed when she and Eli were called to the front of the classroom next.

"Um, before we watch this video…can I just say something?" Eli asked.

"Oh dear," Mr. Larson sighed, "After this last video…I just don't know. Okay, go ahead, I guess, but make it quick."

Eli cleared his throat, "Um…I'd just like to apologize for what's on this recording…"

"Oh lord," Mr. Larson put his head in his hands.

"…and to apologize to Clare for indirectly asking her a personal question that happened to get…unexpectedly recorded. We thought the camera was off…and it wasn't…"

"Oh god," Mr. Larson was shaking his head, "Oh god…"

"So…I'm sorry," Eli turned to Clare and shrugged, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Clare smiled sweetly at him, "Apology accepted."

"I'm scared to press PLAY," Mr. Larson admitted, "but this is all a part of journalism. These videos…they're good at discovering who you're fellow classmates are and…hopefully I don't regret this…" he pressed PLAY and the video began.

**Eli: It's on and…yup, recording. You go first. Tell us about your summer.**

**Clare: Shouldn't we, like, introduce ourselves first?**

**Eli: Why?**

**Clare: Well…I don't know…Hi! I'm Clare Edwards and I am junior here at Degrassi. I like reading and writing and baking.**

**Eli: About your summer,**_**dimwit**_**! Not about your life!**

The class laughed.

**Clare: Hush, Eli. I could stand here and tell you guys that my summer was fantastic – that I went on some big trip to Rome or something with my parents. But, that wouldn't be true. And I can't lie. So here it is. My summer. My parents officiated their divorce. My dad moved to Los Angeles, and my mom married my boyfriend's dad and now we're all living together. I hope to get a summer internship in New York City at a publishing company I applied for; and my goals for this year are to get all A's and, of course, get my internship.**

**Eli: Wait, wait, wait…Back up!**

**Clare: What? What's wrong?**

**Eli: Let me get this straight…your parents finalized their divorce? Like, that's**_**it**_**? And then your dad moved? To LA?**_**Seriously**_**? And your mom married…oh GOD! And don't even get me**_**started**_**on that internship.**

**Clare: What? What's the problem, Eli?**

**Eli: N-nothing I guess. I just…**

**Eli: It's just weird.**

**Clare: What is?**

**Eli: Not knowing what's going on in your life anymore.**

The class made a consecutive, "Ooooh" sound. Clare felt like she could just melt into a puddle of mortification.

**Clare: Your turn! Go!**

**Eli: We aren't done discussing your summer. What else has been going on?**

**Clare: Nope, my turn's up. It's yours now. Go.**

**Eli: Fine…Um…well everyone knows about my breakdown in the middle of the school play. Well, I got some help over the summer so hopefully no more breakdowns.**

"Because he went bat-shi…"

"Nathan!" Mr. Larson snapped, "Shut it!"

**Clare: What kind of help?**

**Eli: I don't think the kids watching this are really interested in…**

**Clare: I think it's off.**

The class giggled.

**Eli: Good. We've both changed a lot over this summer. For the better, and maybe for the not so better. It happens, Clare. People change. Like, take you for instance, you'd **_**never **_**move in with me when we dated.**

Someone said, "Oh SNAP!"

**Clare: The circumstances are different...**

**Eli: So…do you and the jockstrap do it like…**_**every night **_**then?**

Another, "Ooooh!"

**Clare: No..I have my own bedroom there, thank you very much. And don't call Jake a jockstrap!**

**Eli: I'll call him what I want. So…is Saint Clare is just as…**_**saintly**_**?**

**Clare: If this is your way of finding out if I am still a virgin or not…**

The class all giggled and Clare just wanted to melt into the linoleum.

**Eli: **_**Whoa**_**! No one said anything about **_**that**_**.**

**Clare: But you implied it…**

**Eli: I did no such thing…**

**Clare: You're such a pig! Whether I am, or am not, it's still none of your business.**

Someone said, "You go, Clare!"

It was Eli's turn to want to melt.

**Eli: Clare…**

**Clare: And I can't believe you'd even try to…**

**Eli: Clare…**

**Clare: …who asks someone something like that in the first place?**

**Eli: Clare…**

**Clare: It's totally and completely inappropriate conversation especially to be having with…**

**Eli: Clare…**

**Clare: **_**WHAT**_**?**

The whole class laughed again.

**Eli: Does that little red light mean that the camera is still recording?**

**Clare: Eli, what are you even…oh.**

The class was laughing so hard that Mr. Larson had to tell everyone, several times, to calm down. Even he had a smile on his face though.

"That was…quite…entertaining," Mr. Larson admitted, "despite the inappropriate questions of Mr. Goldsworthy. Good job, you two! I am quite proud of the both of you! You really delved in there and truly showed us who you were. Fantastic! You both get 100s."

"Thank you," Clare said before returning to her seat.

Eli grabbed their camera and followed close behind her, "I'm so sorry," he said again.

"Don't be. We made 100s! And he liked it!"

"But the question…about your…um…that thing…"

"Just…don't bring up my virginity ever again and we'll call it good, alright?" Clare held out her hand for a high-five.

"Agreed," Eli said as he high-fived her.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Clare didn't object when Eli followed her to her locker after class. The other video presentations had been so horribly boring in comparison to theirs, and two of them actually didn't mind working with each other. It was almost as if things were back to normal…almost.

"Hey," Jake called as he hurried over to Clare's locker. When he saw Eli standing next to her, his face fell, "What is he doing here?"

"Oh, my partner…she's sick today so Eli and I got paired up for a homework assignment. We were just discussing it."

Eli paused for a moment before backing her up, "Um, yeah. Stupid, Mr. Larson. Clare asked him if she could just work by herself, but he said no. So we're kind of stuck having to do research on a famous journalist and present it to the class."

"Oh," Jake nodded, trying to wrap everything together, "Alright. Well…hopefully the two of you can just get it over with quickly and without too much trouble."

"Don't worry," Clare slid a book into her locker, "If he bothers me, I will just kick him."

Eli shot Clare a sideways glance.

Jake looked from Clare, to Eli, and then back to Clare, "Okay then. See you later, babe," he leaned down to kiss her, and the two of them shared an awkward kiss while Eli became fascinated with the fact that his shoes, when slid across the linoleum, left scuff marks.

Jake waved an uncomfortable goodbye to Eli before heading off to his next class. Clare didn't notice (or just simply chose not to address the fact) that Eli had scuffed a sad face into the linoleum.

"Edwards, lying?" Eli raised a bemused eyebrow, "Impressive."

"Oh shush. So now he thinks we are working on a project together."

"Gives us an excuse to hang out," Eli shrugged.

Clare titled her head to the side and looked at him, confused, "You want to hang out?"

"Well I don't have plans for after school. And, unless I missed the breaking news, I don't think you and Ali are going to be doing anything anytime soon," he noticed how the sparkle in her eyes faded, "…sorry. That was a crappy thing of me to say."

"No," Clare recovered, "it's fine. She's got Jenna now. And I don't need you to hang out with me out of pity, Eli Goldsworthy. Besides…you've got Imogen."

"_Imogen_?" Eli chuckled, "Clare, don't be dumb. Imogen and I are just friends, I guess. And besides, I am not asking you out of pity. Give me some credit; I don't think I'm that big of an asshole."

"Eli…"

"You know what," Eli shoved his hands in his pockets, "I just remembered, I have plans."

"Eli…"

He shrugged as he walked backwards down the hall, leaving her standing, bewildered, at her locker.

Clare slammed her locker door shut with every ounce of anger she had inside her. She was mad at herself, mostly. She didn't know why, exactly. Maybe it had something to do with the butterflies she felt metamorphosing in her stomach each time Eli smirked at her. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that she'd lied to Jake – for no particular reason. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that she wanted nothing more than to hang out with Eli after school.

Why was she feeling these things? Clare knew it was against the rules. She and Eli had broken up and she was with Jake now. Jake, good ol' Jake, who she was now lying to so she could spend time with Eli. Nothing she was doing made any sense to her. Where was her logic? Where was her level-headedness?

She just wanted to disappear or melt into a puddle, or run away and never see Eli Goldsworthy again. But Clare knew that was a lie. She would hate to never see him again. She looked forward to seeing him, and she wanted to slap herself for it. Why did Eli have such an effect on her?

"Hey," Clare glanced up and saw Adam walking towards her.

"Hey, Adam," she forced a smile, "How are you?"

"Better than you, I'm guessing. You look like you're either gonna cry, or beat the crap out of someone."

"I feel like beating the crap out of myself," Clare threw her head back against her locker door, "My journalism partner is driving me up a freakin' wall!"

"Eli?"

"He told you?"

Adam shrugged, "He told me some things. Like how _his_ journalism partner is driving him up a freakin' wall," he smirked, and leaned against the wall next to hers.

"_Me_?" Clare chuckled, "Now that's just a real riot! I haven't done a single thing to him!"

"I don't know about that," Adam's bemused smirk grew into a smile, "Seems you have quite the effect on him."

"I do not have an effect on him," Clare rolled his eyes.

"He seems to have quite the effect on you too."

"Psh," Clare scoffed, "the only effect that boy has on me is nausea – nothing a good dose of Dramamine won't cure."

Adam chuckled, "If you say so."

"What?" Clare turned to him, "Did he say something? Oh my God! He totally said something to you!"

"He said you're a pain in the butt," Adam shrugged, "but I think that's just 'cuz he can't stop thinking about you."

"What?"

Adam pushed himself up from the locker, "Uh-uh," he smirked, "you figure this one out on your own, Clare."

"Adam!" Clare whined, "Help me!"

Adam held his hands up, "Why don't you start by admitting it to yourself that you aren't over him."

"But I am!"

He hooked the cross pendant hanging from her neck with a finger and said mischievously, "Lying in a sin, St. Clare."

Clare spent the rest of the day avoiding Jake so she could concentrate on what Adam had said to her. She didn't still like Eli of all people, did she? Eli was obnoxious and cynical and snarky and a pain in the butt. Why would she ever like someone like him?

But she had liked him – she had even loved him at one point.

She had even loved him. Clare shook the thought from her head as she pretended to pour over her newest vampire novel in the library. She didn't want to think about that. She didn't want to think about loving Eli. Loving Eli had stopped a long time ago.

She realized the librarian was staring at her oddly, and quickly, Clare turned the page of her book.

She began to wonder if fate enjoyed toying with her. As if to answer her question, Eli walked through the doors of the library and marched right over to the table she was sitting at. He grabbed the book out of her hands.

"_The Prince of Night_," Eli scoffed at the title, and turned the book over to read the summary, "Callie Young just moved to live with her father in New York City. It is there she discovers an underground world of vampires, and discovers that the Prince of Night…what the hell is this?"

"It's a good book," Clare went to snatch it back, but Eli held it out of her reach.

"What happened to good literature?" Eli rolled his eyes, "E.E Cummings and C.S Lewis?"

"Vampire fiction is merely a guilty pleasure of mine," Clare gave up on trying to get her book back, "It's better than secretly loving Notting Hill and watching it over and over again…"

"Shut up!" Eli hissed, "It's not the same thing."

"Guilty pleasures are fun and innocent," Clare rolled her eyes, "And mine happens to be vampire fiction. I am sorry you don't approve."

Eli tossed her book back, "I just found out that they're showing one of my favorite movies at The Screen this evening," he shrugged.

"The Screen? That theater that plays cult-classics?"

"The very one," Eli nudged her with his elbow, "You could come."

Clare didn't know why those darn butterflies were back in her stomach, "What are they showing?"

"The Boondock Saints."

"You made me watch it with you once," Clare nodded, remembering.

"And, if I recall correctly," Eli smirked, "you really enjoyed it."

"I-I might not have hated it as much as I had anticipated."

"So what do you say?" Eli nudged her again, "Be my date? _Shit_! Sorry," he blushed, and looked very much like a kicked puppy.

Clare couldn't help but laugh at his expression, "I know what you mean," she patted his arm, "it's fine. I'll be your date."

"I'll pick you up at six. Should I bring a bouquet of flowers?"

"A dozen red roses," Clare teased, "And I expect you to hold the doors open for me."

"Undoubtedly. Should I wear my finest cologne?"

"Of course. But I don't kiss on the first date."

They looked at each other, fighting the urge to smile before breaking out laughing.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Your homework is to go watch The Boondock Saints…or at least Google images of Norman Reedus. Oooh that man!

Chapter Five

_"And shepherds we shall be, for Thee my Lord, for Thee. Power hath descended forth from They hand, our feet swiftly carry out Thy commands. So we shall flow a river forth to Thee, and teeming with souls, shall it ever be – in nomeni Patri, et Fili, Spiritus Sancti._"

Eli doubled over laughing, "I cannot believe you memorized the _whole_ prayer. Someone enjoyed herself."

Clare shrugged casually, "What can I say? I liked it. Although I _do_ disagree with the whole vigilante instructed by God aspect, it is still a really good movie."

"And you think Norman Reedus is hot," Eli teased.

"This is true," Clare nodded solemnly.

"So…let me get this straight. You, Clare Edwards, thinks guys that shoot up people and curse every five seconds are hot? Oh yeah, and he smokes!"

"No," Clare corrected, "I think _Norman Reedus_, as well as the character he portrays, are hot. I think the Phantom of the Opera is hot, but if some random guy kidnapped me from my fiancé, took me down to his dungeon lair, and sang me a romantic song ultimately about raping me and forcing me to be his bride, we'd have some issues."

"Got it," Eli nodded, "I'm glad you had a fun time tonight."

"Me too," Clare had to agree, "Thank you for inviting me to come along with you. It was a nice way to celebrate our 100s on our first journalism project!"

"It's not too bad working with you, Edwards."

"Right back at you."

They hopped into Morty and drove to Clare's house in silence. She stared out the window and the foggy night sky, and smiled. She had had fun with Eli. They had gone all out – popcorn, soda, candy – and had a blast watching the movie. It was nice to watch one of his favorite movies with him again. It almost felt like the first time they watched it, if not better.

The hearse, Eli's pride and joy, pulled up to the curb of Clare's house. She was home, but didn't want to be. If she could, she'd make this night last. But she knew better. She had to go inside and help her Mom with the dinner dishes and tell Jake all about how the journalism project on the famous journalist was going. She would smile and act as if everything was perfectly fine, when on the inside, a hurricane of emotions brewed. Eli made her dizzy, and jumbled up all her thoughts. He exhausted her, and all she wanted to do was crawl into bed, under the covers, and think about how much fun her night had been.

It did feel like a first date. She wanted to squeal and giggle into her pillow. She wanted to tell her mom all about how it went. She wanted to call Ali and sit up and gossip all about everything…but things were different now. And this certainly was no first date.

"Thanks again," Clare placed a hand on the door knob, "I really did have a good time."

"Yeah, me too. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," Clare swung the door open, "Bye, Eli."

"Bye, Blue…Clare," Eli quickly recovered and both he and Clare stood there, as if disappointed with the fact that he had to recover. Eli gave a little wave and Clare shut the car door before headed up to the front door. Again, he waited until she was safe and sound, inside, before driving off.

Clare helped her mom wash the dishes while Jake dried. She told them both that she and Eli had done their report on the first-ever female journalist. She told them that his parents had invited her to stay for dinner, and she did. She told them that everything had been a bit weird and awkward, and how she would be glad when this project would be due so she wouldn't have to work with him again.

Lies, lies, lies. It seemed one lie grew into thousands, and Clare was exhausted from her constant storytelling. She wanted to be able to tell the truth – that she had a blast seeing a movie with Eli – but knew no one would understand. She was with Jake now, and there was no way in heck Jake would be okay with her hanging out with Eli.

Her mom? Her mom was now Jake's stepmom. Clare couldn't exactly go to her for advice either. After doing the dishes, Clare excused herself to her room. Once inside, she quickly shut the door behind her, grabbed her cell phone, and hopped onto her bed. There was one person she could always go to for advice and help…and she hadn't spoken to that person in months. Not since their falling out.

Clare desperately needed a girl to talk to, and was regretting putting Jake before her best friend. What happened to their friendship that seemed to survive everything? Clare had helped knock it all down. Ali had been Joshua, and Clare had been the trumpets. She clicked on Ali's name in her contact list. Clare seriously considered pressing CALL.

Ali always had just great advice and could help her out with anything. Clare decided to go against her better judgment and pressed CALL. Of course, it went to voice mail after about seven rings. Clare could just picture Ali standing there, holding the phone in her hand, wondering if she should answer the call, but choosing against it.

"Hi! This is Ali! I'm out having fun and living it up, but leave a message!"

"Ali," Clare took a deep breath, "I don't know where to begin other than I desperately need your famous girl nights. I need to watch romantic comedies and eat chocolate icing from the can. I need to sit up late and talk to you and gossip and tell you about everything. I am selfish and I know that. I put my love life before you, and that was wrong of me. We both screwed up, but I know I shouldn't have acted the way I did. God, Ali, I really need to tell you everything about all this drama…you'd love it…"

"Hello?"

"Ali?"

"Did you say '_drama_?'" Clare couldn't help but smile; same ol' Ali.

"Yes," Clare tucked herself under the covers, "Everything is _so_ incredibly crazy right now and…you're my go-to-girl. I used to tell you everything. I don't know who else to go to with something like this…I'm sorry…I shouldn't have called…"

"It's alright…I wasn't doing anything too majorly important anyways, and you know how I thrive off of drama. So dish."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Tell me what's got you all worked up."

"Just like that?" Clare couldn't believe it.

"I could make you grovel and kiss my shoes, but I don't want you getting your tacky orange lipstick all over my new Louis…"

"Ali!" Clare practically squealed, "Oh, Ali!"

"Spill it, sister."

"Where do I even begin?" Clare laughed, "Well…Eli and I…"

"Oh no."

"Oh no what?"

"Nothing," Clare could practically see Ali rolling her eyes, "Continue."

"Well, we're partnered up for a journalism project – video yearbooks. At first I thought it'd be completely miserable having to work with him, but it's actually…fun. More than fun. It's like…English class all over again."

"Oh Lord!"

"But the thing is…when Jake asked me about it, I lied to him. I told him that I was working with a new girl from Lakewood…and I don't know why I lied to him but one lie led to another lie and I can't stop lying to him about it. Which is weird. Why would I even lie to him in the first place? Well then Eli asked me to go to the movies with him tonight…"

"Oh no…"

"Yeah," Clare winced, "I kind of had a lot of fun. Like, more fun than when we first started dating. But then I lied to Jake again about how Eli and I were working on a school project this evening, and I have no idea what I am doing or why I even care so much about spending time with Eli or why I feel the need to lie about it."

"Uh-huh," Ali sighed, "Well, Clare…I think you're problem is…you're just not over him yet. And the way it sounds to me, he's not over you yet either. You two have some serious issues…we're talking soap-opera status issues."

"It's awful, huh?" Clare threw her head back against her pillow, "I don't know why…I mean…I don't want to feel this way about him. I don't want all these feelings…I had them once and I don't want them again. But they won't go away. I keep thinking about him and about how much fun we have and how he makes me laugh…we joked about tonight being a date Ali."

"Oh no…"

"Yes! And we joked about not kissing on the first date. There should be rules, right? Like, we shouldn't be saying stuff like that…it crosses the line."

"Maybe that tells you something."

"Like what?"

"That there shouldn't be lines. Look, Clare, obviously what you and Eli had was something very deep and very important to the both of you. I think the two of you are both just a bit confused in regards to where you stand with one another. You want to just pick right up where you left off, but you can't and that's hard for both of you to come to grips with."

"I just wish he'd get out of my head. I wish…"

"I know," Ali's voice softened at hearing Clare's about to break, "How about tomorrow, you come over and we have that girls' night. We have a lot to catch up on."

"How are you just so forgiving?" Clare asked, "I-I was horrible to you…"

"And so was I…but Clare, we've been friends for a long time, and we'll continue to be friends for a long time. I thrive off of drama, but sweetie, I would never let it get in the way of our friendship for good. I was angry and so were you. But you need a friend right now…and to be honest, so do I."

"You?" Clare was curious. She wanted to desperately know what had been going on in Ali's life.

"Yeah," Ali sighed, "just more drama with my parents. Jenna…as sweet as she is, she just doesn't seem to really listen. I know I talk a ton, but when you need something, I listen. She just seems to need me for advice and when I need something, she changes the subject back to herself. Was I ever that bad?"

"Once upon a time," Clare admitted, "but you got better about it. You're the best friend any one could ever ask for, Ali. I am so sorry for everything."

"Me too. So tomorrow night, no date night with Eli. You're going to be having a date night with your best friend, and we'll figure out this whole Eli thing together, alright?"

"Thank you so much, Ali!" Clare sighed with relief, "You have no idea what this means to me…to have someone to share this stuff with. If I ever took you for granted, I am so sorry!"

After saying good night and goodbye, Clare returned her cell phone to her nightstand. It was getting late, and she needed to get some rest; but she was too excited to really sleep. Everything with Eli and now Ali back in her life…Clare couldn't help but grin as she nestled into her pillows.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

"So let me get this straight, your mom married Jake's dad and now all of you guys are living together?"

"Pretty much," Clare smiled a shy smile and took a sip of her coffee.

"So then…" a mischievous grin crossed Ali's face, "…do you and Jake, like…well…_you know_…every night?"

"Oh my God!" Clare shot her friend a look, "Do _not_ ask me that!"

"What?" Ali batted her lashes innocently, "Why not?"

"Because! I cannot believe you! Both you and Eli…"

"Whoa…what?"

Clare sighed before filling Ali in, "Eli asked me that same question a few days ago."

"Eli – ex-boyfriend Eli – asked about you and Jake – current-boyfriend – sleeping together?"

"Yup," Clare nodded, "And no, the whole thing wasn't as awkward as it sounds…it was worse. We thought we had turned the camera off after our V-YD interview…"

"But it was still on?"

"Yeah," Clare winced, "and the whole class watched."

"Ouch."

"But," Clare brightened, "we did both make 100s on the assignment…so that was good, right?"

"Yeah," Ali agreed, "I just…I can't believe so much has changed for you, and I've missed out on hearing every detail."

Clare sipped her coffee, "Ali, I am so sorry for everything. I wasn't myself last semester and I just want you to know that. With my dad's affair and my mom and Jake's dad…and then the whole mess with Eli's issues…I just had a lot on my plate. And it was wrong of me to take it out on you."

Ali rolled her eyes, "_Puh-lease_, Clare. That's old history. Like…the French Revolution. It's in the past and no one talks about it anymore."

Clare rolled her eyes; Ali and schoolwork didn't quite fit hand in hand. She was happy though to be having coffee with her again. She couldn't even begin to describe how much she missed Ali…other than the fact that it felt like a part of her had been missing for months.

"So," Ali changed the subject, "You think you might maybe be having feelings for Eli again?"

"More than might maybe," Clare blushed, and tried to hide behind a sip of coffee, "It's like we've picked up where we left off…only…I know we shouldn't. We can't be what we were. It's over for us, Ali. We both have a lot of anger towards what happened…we can't act how we are."

"And how is that?" Ali pressed.

"Like…like…we were back in last year's English class," Clare sighed, and bit at her thumbnail, "I just can't believe we're just…falling back into place. It's dangerous Ali. It's dangerous how badly…how badly I want to be with him again."

Ali's eyes widened, and Clare corrected her, "Not in that way, dummy! We never slept together."

"Oh," Ali apologized, "sorry!"

"It's alright…I just…I'm worried. I'm worried we're jumping in without looking at how deep the pool is."

"Clare, obviously you and Eli have feelings for each other than you're going to have to face at some point. You can't hide from your feelings forever, Clare. You think you're feelings are dangerous? Hiding from them is even more dangerous. You have to both face it, the two of you never got over each other."

Maybe Ali had a point…maybe she and Eli did need to just sit down and have a good, old fashioned, heart-to-heart about everything. Clare decided that after journalism, she'd ask Eli to meet up after school and the two of them would sit down together and face what they were feeling. It was good to hash things out, right?

Clare shared her plan with Ali, who completely supported the idea.

"We should go," Clare glanced up at the clock, "We don't want to be late for school…"

"Right," Ali hopped up from the table and grabbed her bag, "After you talk with Eli, come by…we are still on for that girl's night, right?"

"Of course!"

* * *

><p>As Clare put her books into her backpack, she thought about what Ali had said. She was scared to death to talk to Eli about her feelings for him, and was dreading having to have that conversation. The bell rang, and she was late to class, but that was the least of her worries. What would Eli say? What would he do? Would talking to him and forcing him to confront this totally push him over the edge?<p>

Clare opened the door to the classroom, and everyone turned and stared. That was the worst part about being late to class…everyone feels the need to stare when you walk in.

"Ms. Edwards," Mr. Larson sighed, "glad you felt like joining us."

"Sorry sir," Clare blushed, "It won't happen again…"

"See to it that it doesn't," Mr. Larson said lethargically as Clare went to take her seat. She was grateful he wasn't the type of teacher that would be angry.

"Since when is St. Clare tardy for class?" Eli shot her a bemused smirk.

"Since she kind of lost track of time having coffee before school with her best friend," Clare gave him a knowing smile.

"You…and Ali?" Eli raised an eyebrow, "Good for you, Edwards."

Mr. Larson cleared his throat and began scribbling something in messy writing on the board. He took a step back, and slammed his hand against the board right underneath what he had just written, "Facts. Can anyone give me a definition of facts?"

Maggie's hand shot up, "Things that are true."

Mr. Larson nodded, "Okay, but I'm looking for a bit more…"

Clare raised her hand, "Things that are proven."

"Things that are proven," Mr. Larson repeated, "Excellent answer, Ms. Edwards. Things that are proven. Facts. Evidence. Proof. Truth. I want you guys to go on a little expedition today with your cameras. I want you all to interview your partners, and three other students. You will ask them questions that I have already thought up, and in class on Monday, we will discuss rather the answers to these questions are fact, or fiction."

Eli turned to Clare, "This should be…interesting."

She nodded in agreement as Mr. Larson wrote the three questions on the board.

_Have you ever told a lie?_

_Have you ever been in love?_

_Have you ever cheated on an exam?_

"Three questions," Mr. Larson droned, "three simple questions. Let's see what the results are! Now go, scram! Dig deep, and," he added with a smile, "get the heck out of my classroom!"

Clare grabbed her backpack and swung it over her shoulder as Eli pulled the video camera from his own backpack.

"Let's do this thing!"

Clare followed Eli out of the classroom and down the hall towards the cafeteria. She felt butterflies metamorphosing in her stomach. Should she go ahead and talk to Eli now about her feelings for him…or stick with her original idea? Clare hated how he made her so nervous.

"You first," Eli hopped up on to one of the tables and aimed the camera at her, "Question One: Have you ever told a lie?"

Clare felt a small blush creep across her cheeks. She had told more lies in the past two days than she ever had in her whole life. She had lied to her boyfriend – her amazingly sweet boyfriend – about spending time with her amazingly obnoxious ex-boyfriend. Clare was beginning to wonder if there was not something seriously wrong with her.

"Um…yes," Clare tried to shrug off her answer, "Everyone lies, Eli."

"What'd you lie about?"

"That's not one of the questions," Clare retorted, sitting down at the table he was currently sitting on, "I only have to answer the three questions."

"Friend to friend," Eli gave her his best kicked-puppy look.

"Friend to friend?"

"Well, yeah. So tell me."

"I am not going to tell you what I've lied about," Clare stubbornly crossed her arms over her chest, "It's none of your business anyway."

"Is that so?"

"Mmhmm. Next question please."

"Have you ever been in love?" Eli asked the required question, despite how much he had been dreading it.

"Yes," Clare answered, matter-of-factly, "I have."

"Have you ever cheated on a test?" Eli asked the final question.

"No. Your turn," Clare took the camera from his hands, and asked, "Question One: Have you ever told a lie?"

"Yeah," Eli answered, "of course."

"Have you ever been in love?" Clare asked the dreaded question.

"Yes," Eli was quick to answer, and Clare was quick to move on to the next question.

"Have you ever cheated on a test?"

"Yes."

"Okay then," Clare shut off the camera, "Let's go find people to interview."

Eli hopped down from the table, "I still want to know what you've lied about," he nudged her with his elbow.

"Like I said," Clare retorted stubbornly, "It is none of your business."

"I make it my business."

"Weirdo."

"Creeper."

Eli sped up to the doorway of the cafeteria, and blocked Clare's exit.

"Tell me," he smirked that devious smirk of his, and Clare turned a furious shade of red.

"I-I don't have to tell you anything…"

"But you do, or you don't leave."

"Eli…this is dumb."

"Tell me what you've lied about."

"Why do you want to know so badly?"

Truth was, Eli wanted to know where he stood with Clare. Did she ever even love him at all, or was that a lie. Was she even over him? Or was that just another lie too?

But why then, did he want to know so badly? Eli dropped his arms to his sides as that thought, that question, played like a broken record in his mind. Why was he so desperate to know where he stood with Clare? Clare was his ex-girlfriend. She had a boyfriend and was living with him. Eli couldn't, shouldn't, be asking those kinds of questions.

She was right. It was none of his business where they stood or what she had lied about. She was no longer his business. Eli shoved his hands into his pockets and moved aside from the doorway. Clare walked past him, and furrowed her eyebrow in confusion.

"Why are you being so weird?" She asked.

"No reason," Eli replied vaguely, "Um…maybe I should just finish out this interview assignment on my own."

"What?" Clare was really confused now, "Why?"

"Well, I don't know…maybe Maggie was right…"

"Right about what?"

"About us working together. Maybe this whole thing is just…too weird. We should switch partners."

"What are you talking about?" Clare demanded, "Eli…a minute ago we were laughing and having fun…"

"Until you decided to just…"

"Just what?" Clare was beginning to grow angry.

"Until you decided to just not answer my question."

"I don't have to answer to you, Eli," Clare hiked her bag onto her shoulder, "Why are you being like this?"

"I'm not being like anything," he could feel the tingle in his spine, the quickening of his breath. The episode was hitting him, but there was no stopping it, "You're the one who thinks we can just act like everything is fine when nothing is fine."

"I'm not acting like anything," Clare desperately was trying to reach him, but he was pulling away too quickly.

"You screw everything up, Clare," his voice was rising, and his pulse was speeding, "You're such a screw up. Everything you touch gets ruined."

"Eli…what the hell?"

"You ruin everything. How difficult is that for you to comprehend. Everything you touch is ruined. I will talk to Mr. Larson about switching partners. I can't work with you. God…how long have you been with Jake?"

"Several months…but I don't see how that…"

"God knows how he puts up with you every day…especially living with you! I'd go insane."

"You are insane," Clare could tell this was an episode, "Maybe you should take something…"

Eli laughed a dry, humorless laugh, "Take something. Good one."

"Eli…"

"Just…stay away from me!"

Clare's jaw fell lax as she watched Eli disappear down the hallway. She knew it was just an episode…but that didn't make his words hurt any less. She had researched bipolar disorder. She knew that people sometimes lose control, think irrationally…but this had been so random. Clare felt as though he had just slapped her in the face.

Why did things have to be so complicated between them?


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

"Dude, just talk to me, alright?"

"No, I don't want to talk about it!"

"Eli…"

"Adam, just…I don't want to talk about Clare or anything else."

"Fine," Adam held his hands up in surrender and backed off, "Whatever."

Eli ran a hand through his hair as he paced around his bedroom, "I asked Mr. Larson if I could work with Maggie for the V-YD project."

"What? Why?"

"Why?" Eli laughed a dry laugh, "Because I can't work with Clare. It was a joke to even think that we could work together. You know…I can't even talk to her – look at her – without…without…"

"Without what?"

"Wanting to kiss her!"

Adam raised an eyebrow, "Dude…"

"I know, I know," Eli shoved his hands into his pockets, "I don't know what to do. I did all I could do. I am working with Maggie now."

"The one that broke out into song and dance…"

"Don't," Eli held up a stern hand, "remind me. But what else could I do, Adam? She's just…things are too complicated between us. There's too much…broken. We can't just pick up and pretend like nothing happened when it clearly did. She's got Jake now…and she…she doesn't need me."

Adam sunk down on Eli's unmade bed, "What makes you so sure?"

"What are you talking about?" Eli raised an eyebrow.

"The hormones are fixing a lot for me," Adam crossed his arms over his chest, "but they haven't managed to get rid of that darn woman's intuition."

Eli made a face.

"Tell me about it," Adam gagged.

"So you really think she…"

"I think she thinks things are complicated and I think she's just as scared as you."

"Scared?" Eli scoffed, "Of what?"

"God, man," Adam groaned, "Grow a pair. I'm not doin' this whole mushy, gushy chick thing with you!"

Eli rolled his eyes, "Just tell me."

"Scared of how she feels of you. Like how you're scared of how you feel of her. That is why you threw a conniption fit and asked to change partners, right?"

If looks could kill, Adam would have been dead and buried, "I really hate you, do you know that?"

"Yup," Adam grinned, "I know."

Clare dipped the spoon into the can of chocolate icing, "If this were any other night, I'd think this is disgusting," she licked the icing from the spoon, "but this isn't any other night."

Ali stuck her finger in the can, "I'm so sorry, sweetie. So he really asked Mr. Larson if he could switch partners?"

"Yeah," Clare nodded at the can, "he did. And now he's partners with Maggie and I'm stuck with stupid old Nathan," she groaned.

"I think he's just scared."

"Scared?" Clare laughed, "Of what?"

"Of what he feels for you," Ali popped a potato chip into her mouth, "And of what you feel for him."

"Ali, don't be ridiculous…"

Ali rolled her eyes, "Fine, don't believe me. I think you two are still crazy in love but too stupid and too scared to admit it. But if you don't want to listen to me, that's fine. We can just sit here and eat junk food and watch Mean Girls."

"I'd take Regina George over my feelings for Eli any ol' day…"

Ali shrieked and Clare looked at her as if she had completely gone off her rocker, "Ali, what the heck?"

"You admit that you have feelings for him!"

"We've been over this…I can't like Eli. I just have to lock my feelings up and hopefully they'll die of starvation or something and I can get on with my life."

"With Jake, you mean."

"Yes," Clare rolled her eyes, "with Jake. My boyfriend. Remember, I have one of those."

Ali smiled, "Then break up with him."

"Break up with him?" Clare dropped the chip from her hand, "For what? For some boy who…"

"Eli will never be just some boy to you, Clare. Come to terms with that. It's only healthy."

"I have a boyfriend," Clare whined, "And I happen to like my boyfriend very much."

"Like?"

"Love."

"Right," Ali nodded, "like I believe that."

"Ali! I do too love Jake! He's great and fun and…"

"He's not Eli."

Clare became suddenly intently interested in the carpeting of Ali's bedroom floor, "No," her voice was a shadow of a whisper, "He's not Eli."


	8. Chapter 8

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey guys! I am so sorry I haven't updated in awhile! I've been working on a new project on .net. It's an awesome story that I'm having so much fun writing so if you want to check it out, just PM me and I'll send you the link. Anyways, hope you enjoy Chapter Eight!**

Chapter Eight

"Eli," Maggie squealed and raced towards him. Eli sighed, ran a hand through his disheveled hair, and waved slightly. Maybe he could think up a really good excuse for not having to talk with her. Eli racked his brain as she got closer and closer.

"Hi there," she giggled, giving him a hug.

"Uh…remember my 'no hugging' policy?" Eli raised an annoyed eyebrow.

"Sorry," Maggie blushed, "I just wanted to say I am so thankful that we are working together for our V-YD projects. This is going to be such a fun year for us. I am really looking forward to getting to know you a bit better. I made flashcards…"

"Uh, what?"

"Flashcards. You know – with my name, birthdate, favorite food, favorite color…"

"And why did you do that?"

"So we can learn more about each other, silly! Now, I'm going to ask that you make up a flashcard for yourself so I can get to really know you."

"You know me enough," Eli shoved his hands into his pockets, "So, I bet you're glad you're not working with Nathan anymore."

"Oh my goodness," Maggie rolled her eyes, "He's such a pig! All he thinks about is girls and sex and beer. He's nothing like you. You're so deep. You're like an onion or a flaky pastry – you have lots of layers. And I am fully prepared to get down to the innermost layers with y…"

"Hold it!" Eli raised a hand, "Innermost layers? Listen, we're just working together on a project. That's it. I don't want you getting any wrong ideas here, Maggie. I am just your partner for a project…"

"Isn't that how you and that Clare girl met?" Maggie raised an eyebrow, and Eli flinched.

"Let's not talk about her, alright?"

"But she must have done something horrible to you to make you want to switch partners. I mean, Nathan was bad but I wouldn't go through the trouble of switching. What'd she do?"

"She's just…" Eli wanted to punch something. He slowly unwrapped his fingers from the tight fist he found them entangled in, and shook his head, "…things are just really complicated between us. It would get in the way of us being able to work successfully and present quality work to Mr. Larson. We just didn't want our differences to get in the way of our school project."

"Oh," Maggie nodded, trying to understand, "I get it. You just need to move on past her. It's unhealthy to be so focused on her. Besides, she hurt you. She doesn't deserve your time or your attention. You just need to kick her to the curb."

"It's not so simple," Eli rolled his eyes, hiking the backpack onto his shoulder and slamming the locker shut, "It's complicated, Maggie. Clare and I…well…there's a lot that's between us."

"Well throw out that garbage and move on," Maggie batted her eyelashes, "To someone better."

"I have a problem with throwing out garbage," Eli admitted, "Sometimes I get mixed up on what's garbage and what's something to keep."

"Well I can assure you, that girl is garbage."

Eli winced again, and adverted his eyes to the scuffed linoleum floor, "Like I said, sometimes I don't know what's garbage and what's not."

Maggie sighed, "It's not that hard."

"It is for me," Eli was growing frustrated, "Look, you want me to just forget her and move on – presumably to you, am I correct?" Maggie blushed, and Eli continued, "But I can't do that. She's not just garbage to be thrown out. She's not moldy pizza crust or a broken CD."

"I…"

"Don't," Eli held up a hand, "You're sweet, Maggie. You are. And you're cute. Lots of guys will be into you. But I think – at least for now – the one girl for me is Clare. Rather I have her or not, she's the one for me. Which means it would be unfair of me to try to squeeze you into the picture. It'd be unfair to you. Nathan may be a pig, but sometimes opposites attract. Maybe in a few years the two of you will be couple," Eli nudged her playfully, "Don't write anyone off just yet."

"But I have to write you off," Maggie looked as though she wanted to cry, and Eli wanted to kick himself.

"Look, when you fall in love, you'll understand. You can't just throw out that love and be done with it. That love always is there."

"What if she doesn't want to date you?"

"Well then, that's her choice. But she is the only girl for me."

"I get it," Maggie nodded, "It's…sweet. You really do love her, huh?"

"Yup," Eli rolled his eyes, "And I could just kill her for it."

Maggie returned his playful smile, "Then go get her."

"Maggie…"

"Eli…" Maggie glared at him, "Don't make me sing the camp song again."

"Alright, alright," he laughed, "I'm going."

"Good luck."

"Thanks. Oh, and Maggie, look – if you ever need someone to just talk to or something…"

"I got your phone number from the school directory."

"Creeper."

Maggie slugged him, "Go get her, Eli."

Eli nodded, "I shouldn't have let her get away in the first place."

Clare was sitting at one of the picnic tables outside when Jake approached her. He was holding his phone in his hand, and he didn't look happy. Clare glanced up from her vampire novel she was reading.

"Hey you," she smiled, "What's up?"

"Why haven't you been returning my phone calls?" Jake demanded.

"I had a girls' night with Ali last night," Clare explained, "I turned off my phone. I didn't want any interruptions. I'm sorry. Is everything alright?"

"No, no it's not. Clare," Jake sat down next to her, "Look, first you were spending a lot of time with that new journalism partner and then you randomly go for a girls' night with a friend you haven't spoken to in months. I am just really confused I guess…"

"Jake, you've been busy too with your sports stuff."

"Clare, I feel like you're drifting apart from me. We live in the same house now, and I feel like I'm seeing you less and less. I just want to see my girlfriend every once in awhile."

"Jake…" Clare tucked a bookmark into her novel, "I don't know what to say…I'm trying but I've just been busy. It happens sometimes – people get busy and then things calm back down and…"

"Clare, I just feel like you are putting everyone else before me. I feel like I'm not even apart of your life anymore. And then I see that Goldsworthy kid talking to that gay kid…"

"Adam is transgendered," Clare rolled her eyes.

"Whatever," Jake shrugged, "Anyway, they were talking about you and about Eli being your journalism partner. Why'd you lie to me, Clare? What's going on between you and Eli?"

"Nothing," Clare laughed, trying to shake his words off, "Nothing is going on between us. That girl and I didn't work well together so we switched partners and Eli…"

"I don't want to hear it. You lied to me, Clare. You lied."

"Jake…I don't even know what to say."

"Then keep your mouth shut. For once, I'm doing the talking. This is me talking, Clare: we are done. I'm done. I'm sick of playing from the bench Clare."

"Jake…don't do this! Please!"

"Do you mean that?" Jake asked, standing from the table, "Or are you just saying that because that's what you're supposed to say when you're being broken up with?"

"Jake…" Clare tried to get her eyes to fill with tears, but the tears wouldn't come. She tried to force herself to feel upset – angry, sad, anything! But she didn't feel anything other than…relief? Clare tried to shake the thought from her head, "Jake…after all we have been through…"

"Sometimes you just have to throw out the garbage," Jake shook his head and walked away. Clare opened her mouth, but no words came.

Garbage. Jake had called her garbage. She hadn't meant to put everything else before him. She hadn't meant to ignore him. It just…happened. Suddenly Jake wasn't the most important person to her anymore. Clare had to wonder to herself though, was he ever?

"Hey," Clare looked up to see Adam walking towards her, "You look like someone just slapped you. Who do I have to pummel?"

"No one," Clare shook her head, "Jake just broke up with me."

"Really? What a douche."

"He said he felt like I was putting everything else before him."

"Were you?"

"I-I don't know. I guess I just felt like…I don't know what I felt, Adam. All I know is that I'm not even sad it's over. I felt like he and I have been over for such a long time now. It's almost…a relief."

"Well now you and Eli can get it on again!"

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Adam, what are you talking about? Do you know something I don't?"

"Of course I do," Adam smirked, "I am smarter than you. And all-knowing."

"Don't be a butthead."

"Oooh, harsh," Adam grinned, "Come on."

"Where are we going."

"We aren't going anywhere. You are going over there," Adam pointed to the parking lot, "See that black hearse over there?"

"Yes," Clare blushed, "Too well."

"Alright, well you are going to go over there and see that broody kid standing next to it with his hands in his pockets kicking at the cement?"

"Yes," Clare's brow furrowed, "Adam…"

"You are going to go over there and talk to him."

"Adam…why? I bet he doesn't even want…"

"He asked me to get you over there. I get a sandwich out of the deal," Adam grinned, "So get your butt over there and say I hi so I can get my damn sandwich."

Clare laughed, "Alright, I'm going, I'm going."

She grabbed her backpack and purse and headed towards the parking lot. Clare was overcome with nerves, and she had to fight against the urge to bolt. Eli was the last person she wanted to speak to after what had happened the day before. As she got closer, he turned and stared at her without taking his hands from his pockets.

"Apparently you owe Adam a sandwich," Clare leaned against the hood of the hearse.

"He did get you over here."

"Because you were too big of a baby to come and apologize to me yourself."

"Apologize? For what?"

"For what you said to me yesterday and how you reacted."

"Okay," Eli gave in, "I was kind of a douche bag, huh?"

"Major douche bag," Clare fought the smile that was creeping across her face, "And if you must know, I have lied several times throughout my life. One of those lies just happened to get me broken up with."

"The jockstrap broke up with you?"

"Don't call him that," Clare rolled her eyes, "And yes. Because I lied about being your journalism partner. I don't ever know why I did it, I just felt like Jake would feel…threatened or something like that. Because of our history together."

Eli nodded, "I guess I should feel flattered."

"Oh no," Clare winced, "Like your ego needs any more boosting."

Eli chuckled, "Do you think Mr. Larson would let us switch back?"

"Probably not," Clare admitted honestly.

"Maggie and I had a good talk today."

"About bunnies and unicorns?"

"Shut up," Eli rolled his eyes, "We talked about you."

"Me?"

"Yeah. She said that I should go get you."

"Get me?" Clare raised an eyebrow, "Is that so?"

"Yeah," Eli leaned on the hood next to her, "But she's an underclassman – what does she possibly know about anything, right?"

"Right."

"I mean…you and I…we'd never work."

"We tried and failed once."

"Yeah, and it wasn't exactly pleasant."

"No," Clare agreed, "But there were some good times."

"That there were," Eli agreed, "Like the time Adam made you laugh at lunch and milk came out your nose and all over your new shirt you were all excited about."

Clare giggled at the memory, "Sometimes I miss the three of us hanging out."

"You still talk with Adam sometimes."

"We weren't sure how you'd react if you really knew. But he's one of my best friends," Clare admitted, "He is one of the few people that can make me smile no matter how sucky I feel."

"Who are the other people?" Eli asked, as casually as he could.

"You," Clare admitted, kicking the concrete.

"Is that so?"

"Yeah. You've always been able to cheer me up."

"I'm sorry I haven't been around much for that," Eli apologized, "You needed a friend and I bailed. You must have been going through so much with Jake's dad and your mom and that whole mess."

"Yeah," Clare nodded, "But I got through it."

"I should have still been there," Eli folded his arms over his chest, "We were friends first. Why can't we be friends still?"

"Because, Eli," Clare shook her head, "I don't want to be friends."

"What?" Eli felt as though she had just stabbed him, "What do you mean?"

"I mean," Clare laughed, nudging him with her shoulder, "I want to be more than just your friend, Eli."

"Woman," he waggled a finger at her, "Don't scare me like that."

"But it's fun to watch you squirm."

"Don't make me grab you and kiss you," Eli warned.

"Grab me and kiss me?" Clare blushed.

"Yup," Eli smirked, "Don't tempt me."

"Eli…"

"That's it. I've gone months without doing this, I'm not waiting any longer," Eli grabbed her, pinned her against the car and smothered her with a kiss. The kiss lasted for about a minute, and was filled with hunger and passion. As they pulled away, Eli smirked, "That was almost as good as I remembered."

"Eli!"

"What?" Eli smiled.

"You can't just go around grabbing people and kissing them!"

"Like you objected," Eli rolled his eyes.

"But…you're not even my boyfriend."

"Then let's fix that, huh?"

"What?"

"Clare, don't be dumb. I'm asking you to be my girlfriend. "


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

"Your girlfriend?" Clare choked on the words, "Eli…we've been over this. What we had was…was super special…but we…we broke it."

"Psh," Eli scoffed, "Don't you know I'm the master at repairing broken things?"

"Eli…"

"Clare? Look, if one little 'yes' is too much for you to grasp…"

"Yes!" Clare eagerly exclaimed, "Yes, Eli! I want to be your girlfriend again!"

"Is that so?" Eli smugly folded his arms across his chest.

"Eli!"

"Alright," Eli grinned, nudging her, "God…I've missed you, Clare."

"I've missed you too," Clare admitted, "It's been so tough for me. Last year without you in my life…something big or exciting or tragic would happen and I'd instantly want to walk to your house to tell you or call you on the phone. So many times I've seen you sitting at lunch and I've had to fight the urge not to sit down next to you."

"I got help with my bipolar, Clare. I am on my meds regularly and am on a tight sleeping and eating schedule. I'm doing better…but I kept thinking in all those therapy sessions…how badly I just wanted you sitting there next to me. My parents have been great but…I miss you. I want you to be the one helping me. And I know that's a lot to ask…"

"I'm always here for you, Eli. I am so happy that you're getting help!"

"It's no biggie," Eli shrugged casually, "Let's go see if we can find Mr. Larson. Maybe he'll be understanding."

"That means that poor Maggie will have to work with Nathan again and he is just awful, Eli!"

"I told her opposites attract. Maybe in a year or two she won't think he's so awful," Eli smirked, throwing his arm over Clare's shoulders, "You never know."

Clare and Eli walked into the school together to find Mr. Larson. Clare's heart was racing as Eli pulled her tighter against him. She had missed this so much – the feel of his baggy black sweatshirt against her skin, the smell of his aftershave, the feel of his shaggy hair against her cheek, the sensation of his laughter in her ear. She had missed all of it so much, and couldn't help but smiling so big that she felt as though her face would break into two.

Eli's heart was also racing. It felt as though at any minute it'd burst through his chest. He was nervous and excited. He still was unsure of how to act around Clare. It reminded him of how he was with her when they first began dating…the first time. He had been so worried of screwing everything up. Now, he found himself almost even more nervous. But she had given him a second chance, and that was something.

He had prayed each night that somehow they'd work out – that somehow they'd have the chance to work out. Now, here he was, walking down the hallway with his arm draped over her shoulders. She seemed to just fit there, and it was perfect. They did just fit together like two discarded puzzle pieces. Eli smirked as he thought of Adam. Adam had bugged him enough about getting back together with Clare. He'd be glad when he heard that they were back together.

_Shit,_ Eli mentally cursed. He had forgotten to give Adam his bologna and pepper-jack on rye sandwich. Oh well. He was walking down the halls of Degrassi High with Clare Edwards by his side. Adam and that stinky sandwich suddenly didn't seem to matter. Poor Adam.

Clare nudged him with her hip, and he returned the favor earning himself a moment of her laughter.

"Eli."

"Clare?"

"I am so happy!"

"Good," Eli grinned, "I'd be concerned if you weren't. If you weren't, I might have to give you the name of my head-shrinker."

They reached the journalism classroom and Eli said, "Okay, even if we can't get work together, it won't be that bad. I mean, it's not like it'd be the end of the world or anything…"

"Um, you try to be Nathan's partner for seriously, like, five seconds. I am sure you'd change your tune."

Eli nodded, giving her the benefit of the doubt. Together, they walked into the classroom and greeted Mr. Larson.

"Oh no," the man put his head in hands, "Don't tell me. You want to switch back as partners?"

"Well sir, we just thought that you – being the wise teacher as you are – probably knew what you were doing, more so than we, when you placed us together as…"

"Mr. Goldsworthy, cut the crap," Mr. Larson looked up from his palms and shot Eli a death-glare.

"Sorry sir."

"Hmm," Mr. Larson stood from his desk, "When I placed you together as partners, it was because I could sense there was something between the two of you that needed working out. I suppose I was correct in my assumption, am I right?"

"Yes sir," Eli answered.

"Okay. And I am assuming whatever needed working out got in the way of you two working together yesterday, and in a fit of anger and frustration, you decided you wanted to change partners?"

"Sir…I have bipolar disorder – as I am sure the school has informed you – and sometimes I make rash…"

"Eli," Mr. Larson shot him a sideways glance, "What did I say about cutting the crap?"

"Right," Eli folded his hands and stared at the linoleum, "Consider it cut, sir."

"And Ms. Edwards, am I correct in my presumption that you and Eli worked out your differences this lunch period, and now are requesting to work together as partners…once again?"

"Yes sir," Clare agreed, "I am sorry for letting our issues stand in the way of the assignment…"

"Hmm," Mr. Larson drummed his fingers on his desk, "Alright. You can work together again. My mother canceled our cable subscription, so now I can't watch my soaps. I get my entertainment from my students' drama. Why not! You're partners again!"

"Your mother, sir?"

"Mr. Goldsworthy…"

"Sorry, sir."

Clare rolled her eyes before turning her attention and gratitude to Mr. Larson, "Mr. Larson, sir, thank you so much for your understanding. I am just so grateful for your understanding. Eli and I won't let the drama stand in the way of our assignments."

"Good," Mr. Larson sat back down at his desk, "You can return my favor by doing a separate little assignment. Interview each other on what Degrassi means to you. I will include the interviews in the V-YDs. Got it?"

"Yes sir, thank you sir!"

As they exited the classroom, Clare swore she heard Mr. Larson say, "I still can't believe Mother canceled my soaps!"


End file.
